In an effort to attract more readers, my publicist would like me to include more keywords in my blog. For those of you who don’t speak marketese, keywords are the words you type into a search engine like Google, when you’re looking for an article on, oh, I don’t know…Justin Bieber. My publicist thinks if I include more keywords about trending topics then my blog might pop up on more people’s browsers.

Say you’re wondering what the number one selling song in America is today (Gangnam Style), then simply type that into the search engine, and voila! You’ll have your answer. Or maybe you’re more interested in Honey Boo Boo or you can’t believe the fiasco with the NFL Referees. All you have to do is type it in and there it is.

There’s lots of information out there about such interesting topics as Google’s 14th BirthdayNaked Kate Middleton PicturesApple’s iPhone 5 MapsFacebook, YouTube Viral Videos, Emma Watson, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2Miley Cyrus’s New HaircutTaylor Swift and Conor Kennedy, Dancing with the Stars, Cute Kittens, the New Hobbit Trailer, Obama vs Romney, and if Ryan Gosling is going to star in the movie version of 50 Shades of Grey.    

With a little bit of luck, maybe one day my new book, The Door in the Sky, will become the best young adult fantasy and my name, Sandy Klein Bernstein will be right up there on the list of best-selling authors like JK Rowling, Suzanne Collins, and Cassandra Clare. 

I Have To Write a What?

I thought I was done. I mean, I wrote my book, I edited it, I published it. Done, right? Wrong!  Because in addition to my book, I also have a publicist. And you know what you get when you put the two together? Baby books that market themselves? No! You get a website. And a blog. And a Twitter account. And a GoodReads account. And a LibraryThing account. And a Google+ account. And a Pinterest account. And a Starbucks gift card (she is a very nice publicist). And a Facebook profile. Even my book has its own facebook page (it’s in a committed relationship, in case you are wondering. And its favorite band is One Direction).

But back to my onslaught of social media. Apparently, it’s not enough to just have a blog. I’m expected to write in it. I seriously cannot fathom why anyone would have any interest in my day-to-day life, but I am just the tiniest bit afraid of my publicist (she may be petite, but she’s also kind of scary).

So please read my blog. And “like” my book’s Facebook page (after seeing how many subscribers that Harry Potter, The Hunger Games and Betty White’s new book has, it is experiencing a sudden bout of low self-esteem). At least poke it.